Smoking can be an extremely rewarding activity. Cigarettes are a great way to get rid of stress, slowly develop lung cancer, contract emphysema, make bad breath, stain teeth and, to top it off, look really cool. Actually, I am confident in my assumption that we have all had some form of anti-smoking literature pushed in our face at one point or another. So I do not feel the need to go into detail about the consequences of smoking. We all know the consequences of smoking, so I would like to discuss the look of a smoker in mid-use.
I find it hard to believe that a non-smoker feels comfortable in the presence of a lit Sin Stick. I believe the aroma of a cig is extremely unappealing to a non-smoker. It is like being in the presence of someone who breaks wind. It smells great to the one who broke wind, but the receiver has a few unhappy minutes to look forward to. As well as smelling, smoking looks trashy in general. Sitting with a look of exhaustion, with a lit cig between fingers and a pervasive smell of smoke, does not sound like a great way to spend five or six minutes. After the deed of smoking is completed, a musty smell of death resides on the clothes. I would not want to talk with anyone who smelled like a mixture of tar, cancer, and death. It’s just not my style.
Smoking also prohibits other activities; you only have one hand available for your personal use. If both hands are needed, an awkward shoulder-raise has to be preformed in order to keep the object in your hands from getting burned. What if you need to grab a small child falling from a tree house? What if someone told you they would give you a million dollars if you could spread your all your fingers apart really fast? These are obviously situations that do not happen often, but still, you never know. The price of the Devil’s Playtoy is also outrageous. For argument’s sake, lets say that each pack of cigs is six dollars. Lets also say that a casual smoker puffs two packs a week. Twelve dollars times fifty-two weeks is 624 dollars a year! Now, if I am dating a smoker, in the back of my mind I know that the 624 dollars a year is a whole lot of money taken away from my birthday present or a gift of similar merit. This is very discouraging for someone heading into a relationship and perhaps they may think twice before they do so.
Finally, coming from a male perspective, why would any guy want to get close to a girl who is smoking? I saw a billboard once that read “Kissing a smoker is like licking an ash tray.” I don’t know if you have ever licked an ashtray, but I can think of plenty other things I would rather do. So a word of caution for all of you girls out there: when smoking the Cylinder of Death, try not to get to close to anyone who may like you. I’m sure the same applies to guys.
I really don’t see anything cool or relaxing about inhaling a cloud of chemicals. If you need some way to relax, go to sleep or listen to music or take a shower or get a massage or read a book or even pretend to smoke. Personally, I find sleeping the most relaxing activity of all. If you don’t have time to sleep, try playing rock-paper-scissors instead of smoking. It is fun and creates a sense of companionship between the two competitors. The great thing about all of these alternate activities is that they do not involve inhaling chemicals that may one day end your life. Here’s a challenge for all of you smokers out there: try to go three weeks without lighting up. I personally know someone who is on that mission and I have one thing to say: three weeks is a long time and a broken promise is as useful as a battery acid flavored lollipop. Good luck to all of those who are willing to get those Cancer Sticks off their minds forever.
