News Senior Staff Reporter
And now, for my final article for the Choate News ever, I am going to explain how to write Fashion Forward. After all, I should know; this is the twentieth article I’ve written on the subject. After two years of typed drivel under this heading of preppy designer insignia, I have realized what works and what doesn’t work. The following are some gentle reminders for my talented, yet naïf, successors.
Rule numero uno: Do NOT mention specific labels. What do you think this is, some kind of fashion column? No, I’m sorry, but I’ve written too many blurbs for this Choate rag just to watch Fashion Forward become some kind of shrine to overpriced clothing and trends. Write about what you see and observe, not what you read on the back of someone’s shirt. Furthermore, which phrase is more descriptive: black Prada pumps or black pumps ornamented with solid gold buckles and caviar? Stick with the caviar-coated words and your readers will know exactly what you’re talking about. Besides, it’s not as if Prada is the only designer that combines footwear and fish eggs.
Rule number two: DO keep a sense of humor about your writing. For example, I was kidding about the caviar-coated pumps.
Rule number three: Do NOT say that “preppy is in.” We go to Choate. Preppy is always in. Let’s strive for something more creative than stating the obvious. And I hate the way pink and green look together.
Rule number four: DO make every member of your dorm “best dressed.” It saves time and makes people happy.
Rule number five: Do NOT be afraid to insert your own opinions into this column, be they related to fashion or other topics. Worried about the environment? Write about how stylish hybrid cars are. Hate sit down lunches? Declare that the sitting still and engaging in awkward silence really ruins a well-planned outfit. Writing an opinion column for the News is a way to be heard in its own way and should not be wasted on couture commentary.
If you think you can do all this, congratulations! Contact Briana Fasone and she will hook you up with your brand-spanking-new Fashion column.
Lauren’s Last Best Dressed:
Boys: Aaron Rawlins ’07. He’s a classy kid, on and off the Frisbee pitch. Check out his collection of scarves and concert tee’s and you’ll see what I mean.
